the Moufflet Touch

Yesterday, and we had to make silver out of lead. Just kidding. I’m taking chemistry, not alchemy. The teacher threw a whole bunch of chemicals at us and told us to make 1.00g of Ag.

This involved playing with silver nitrate (AgNO₃), and the damned stuff dissolved colorlessly into water, and since we figured bad stuff like snakes, butterflies, and bubblegum Smarties were always obnoxiously colored, this couldn’t hurt.

Now, as I discovered last night in the shower after frantically scrubbing, scraping, poking, and picking, I now have some permanent marks on my hand:

Of course, maybe there were directions on the bottle, maybe there wasn’t, but the sneaky stuff according to Wikipedia “will not produce immediate or even any side effects other than” stains. Unless you have a higher exposure, in which case you might develop argyria, where your organs turn and skin turn blue-gray, perfect if you care are Nightcrawler. At any rate, my hand is going to stay this way until I get a new layer of skin. Sometimes I wish we molted.

Whoever thinks having fingertips of precious metals is great is very wrong. King Midas learned his lesson, but at least he was able to wash his curse away in a river.