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March 1, 2009 at 10:00 PM Leave a comment

Chinese school teachers are retarded.

Sometimes, you figure out a smarter way to do things — like instead of classifying 45 Chinese actions as either “Positive”, “Negative,” or “Either” (half of which I don’t understand), just circling the entire damn thing and drawing an arrow to point to “Either,” since it’s perspective that decides what’s what.

Some might call it being a “smartass”, but really the Chinese school is just being communist (what’s new?) and wants you to be like everyone else. At any rate, the teacher doesn’t think it’s efficient, and decides to waste an already dead tree, and give me another sheet. Surprised at his stupidity given the wisdom that he should have accumulated in his old age, I tried to enlighten him before it was too late, but he wouldn’t take it.

So we give and take a few rounds, and finally he blows his top and says, “I’m not going to beg. I have enough money. I’m not going to beg.” Which stumped me because we weren’t saying anything about money. Anyways, I assumed I won.

But teachers don’t play fair. When they can’t convince you, they cheat and decide to call your parents.

The parents, naturally prejudiced and already on the side of the teachers, start yelling at you and talking about respect and the family name shame. I didn’t listen much, but they did bring up an interesting point of how I “disbehaved” more often in Chinese school when they said they couldn’t send me anywhere else because they all knew of my notoriety, which is fine by me.

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